Why I’m not afraid to sit alone and why you shouldn’t be either.

I know what I bring to the table, so trust me when I say I’m not afraid to sit alone, and you shouldn’t be either.


If you’re like me you’ve lived a life of people pleasing, of molding to what everyone else wanted you to be, pretending to be a certain way based on who was sitting at the table. You pretend to care, maybe even gossiped when you know you shouldn’t, and completely transform who you are for whoever is around you.

You stand up from the table, feeling empty, wondering why you even engaged with those people, knowing darn well they weren’t the type of people who were getting you closer to who you wanted to become.

Maybe you did it because you were lonely, maybe you did it to be cool, whatever the case is I know we can all think of times it’s happened.

I read a quote the other day that said don’t go looking for love when you’re lonely, just like you shouldn’t go grocery shopping when you’re hungry. I think the same goes for friendships. When we don’t feel enough on the inside, we will take whatever we can get on the outside, including toxic people. But when we build ourselves up and see our worth, we have no urge to surround ourself with anyone who isn’t building us to being the best version of ourselves. 

Spend this first year of the decade getting to know yourself, embracing what you love, embracing what lights your fire, taking note of the person you want to become and start working at that. Others don’t define you, others don’t make you great, you do that all on your own my friend.

You are freaking amazing and deserve to be surrounded with people who make you feel that way. An easy way to keep yourself in check on this journey is a simple question “is what I’m doing now, getting me closer to where I want to be?” If the answer is no, redirect your attention and focus. If we keep doing what we’ve always done, we will get what we’ve always got, so swerve my friend and don’t you dare take a seat unless you truly want to. 

xo, Allie